Stupid Things From the Mouth of Dianna

I shouldn't do the safari when I'm tired.  That last sentence was my original title of this post actually.  But it's true.  I need to get more sleep.  Here is a list of the stupid things I said on the safari today... during my 8 hour shift of driving in circles talking about animals who randomly jump into the road in front of me.

"Flamingos are the lightest pink of all flamingos." ....no.  That's not right.

"Ostriches can run up to 70 miles an hour!"  ....nope.  Not right either.

"The Ankole Cattle's long horns can grow up to 6 feet in length and 20 feet around at the base!"  I actually said this one a few days ago... the guy behind me repeated, "Feet?"  and then I realized what I said.  Fail.

"Watering holes like this one up here on the right are great places for black rhinos to hang out!"  Guest response, "Umm... that's the left."  Me: "I always fail at directions."

"And up here on the left you'll see some giraffes out there in the distance."  This would have been normal to say.  Except there were no giraffes within sight.  In fact there were only elephants.

We sell this shirt and it just seemed to fit this post like a glove.

"These crocs can snap their jaws shut with over 12,000 pounds per square inch of force!"  Yep... that would be a gross exaggeration.

Fortunately I caught every one of these and was able to correct it.  I just wish the guests would have laughed at me.  I think it would have made me feel better.  Usually I would just pause after saying it and then say, "Nope, that's not right..." And then I'd correct myself.  I've certainly learned my lesson about turning my brain on autopilot.

One time I came around to see the ostrich and accidentally called it a giraffe.  I corrected myself in a way like this, "And up here to the left you can see a giraffe.... wait... noooo, that's an ostrich.  Just kidding!  Whoever caught that gets two points!"

Anyway, final point: Dianna needs more than 6 hours of sleep.  Or else.

Also.  I'm tired.